Let’s Trade Constitutional Amendments

I’m a big fan of stark choices. Stark choices push trivialities aside, expose underlying problems and bring hidden motivations to light. There is nothing more satisfying than watching well nursed notions self-destruct when reduced to stark choices. Here’s a stark choice our corrupt ruling class will never put on ballots, or discuss, or dare mention.

We can continue riding our gun-toting financial train wreck or we can repeal the Second Amendment, the right to bear arms, and substitute a Balanced Budget Amendment in its place.

Citizens lose the right to bear arms and government loses the right to borrow and print money. To my tiny programmer brain this seems like a completely fair trade. The Second Amendment was never about creating a safe cozy society. It was all about safe-guarding liberty; it still is. Today, the biggest threat to the liberty of Americans is our own government. If it was cut down to a fiscally sustainable size the need for firearms, to shoot the bastards in DC, would dramatically subside and then all of us, left, right, up, down, top and strange could join hands for one big happy Kumbaya-a-thon.

Yeah I didn’t think so.

Still it’s fun to play these mind games. If by some miracle, and I’m talking Red Sea parting here, my amendment swap ever got serious consideration, it would be amusing to watch the partisan cockroaches1 run for cover.

For the left the primacy of the state is everything. Gun control is far more about control than it is about guns and public safety. Faced with the dramatic curtailment of largely wasteful government social programs, a logical consequence of balanced budgets, your typical lefty would happily accept one, two, three, maybe more kindergarten massacres per year to keep their beloved entitlements flowing.

As for the gun rights crowd: many of them clamor for balanced budgets but I suspect many would go all, “deficits don’t matter,” if they had to cough up their beloved 9mm pistols, sawed off shotguns and AR-15’s.

There is very little intellectual honesty or creativity on either side of this debate and I’m tired of it. If we don’t fall off the damn fiscal cliff I’m going push your dumb asses over it. Have a merry freaking Christmas and a less miserable New Year!


  1. My apologies to cockroaches. You are fine upstanding arthropods while political partisans barely reach the level of toxic waste.

Election Reflections

About the only surprise coming out of the recent US election was Puerto Rico’s foolish vote to seek statehood. People, you don’t board the Titanic after it has hit the iceberg. In time Puerto Ricans will learn what Quebec separatists have already painfully absorbed. If fence-sitting is your main tactic for extorting favors from larger entities stay on the goddamn fence. The minute you hop off the larger entity goes back to giving less than a crap about you. The new independent senator from Maine should pay attention. Nobody in the larger United States, or anywhere else for that matter, cares a whit about Maine. It only comes up in postcards featuring lighthouses. As a person from an even smaller state Montana, (yes tiny Maine has more people than Montana), I am not belittling you I’m merely pointing out that there aren’t enough of you to tip elections one way or the other so the political establishment will not, can not, and never will give a fresh firm shit unless you’re in position to extract favors. Sending a fence-sitter to the senate is smart politics but only if he stays on the fence! The people of Montana weren’t smart enough to elect an independent and reelected a garden variety Obama stooge. This only makes sense if you want to be ignored.

My Iranian born wife is a new American citizen and this was her first presidential election. She reliably cancelled my vote so the political establishment sucked a big goose egg out of our household. During the interminable election I kept reading about couples fighting about their partner’s choice. Some went so far as to “misplace” ballots and get snotty about driving each other to the polls. In my naive, brain-dead youth, I used to swallow, “think not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country”, hogwash. I really felt that my relationship with my country was vitally important, certainly more important than a possibly temporary spouse. People get divorced all the time but their countries abide. Well, not really, I’m a dual citizen; my wife holds three citizenships. Countries matter but if you don’t value your wife or husband more than your country you’re either in a bad marriage or you’re a moron. In a few short years, when our runaway fiscal train finally jumps the rails and plunges into the abyss, a good spouse will be far more valuable than bankrupt government social programs. For lucky bastards like me that’s already the case.

Iranian Regime Justice is pathetic Sharia Savagery.

Yousef Nadarkhani

Yousef Nadarkhani

I rarely comment on the “news” but the planned execution of Yousef Nadarkhani for the make-believe crime of Islamic apostasy has really pissed me off. Once again the Iranian branch of the “religion of peace” shows its primitive, ass-backwards, subhuman side to a stunned world that finds it hard to believe that changing your mind about fictitious religious nonsense is punishable by death! It’s rubbish like this that turned me into a hardcore atheist. If this is Sharia then Sharia is shit!

Let’s be perfectly clear. I am not condemning Iranians. I am married to an Iranian!  I have many lovely Iranian in-laws, and not a single one of them approves of this atavistic assinity. Like civilized people everywhere their feelings alternate between disgust, shame and rage. While I forgive the Iranian people I condemn the Iranian regime. The government courts that imposed this sentence are pathetic throwbacks. They don’t belong in the modern world and one day they won’t.

Savages always assume they can bully and terrorize people forever. At first people are easily cowed but even the most egregious assaults fail to deter in the long run. The next time the Iranian masses take to the streets the regime will fall and with the exception of a few islaminals nobody is going to miss it!

P.S.  Before you go all brave fatwa waving kafir killing jihad warrior on me keep in mind that Missouri is a concealed carry state.

Debt Dolts Diddle and Drone!

Government Fiscal Policy

Well well it turns out that when John Boehner isn’t crying like a little girl he can deliver a speech. Tonight he smoked Obama like a fine cigar. I tried to flip around Obama’s debt limit rant but ended up watching like a gawker at a hospital fire.

Any dolt with a fifth graders grasp of arithmetic can see the US is completely and irrevocably broke! We’re in such a deep dark debt hole that we haven’t seen sunlight for eons. Financial rickets is setting in; the soft bones of the republic will soon need Viagra.

But don’t worry our elected pets have a plan! They’re going to borrow and print more money so we can wire up our deep dark dept hole with overpriced union-made lamps connected to a green, made in China, energy source. If the government’s math is right the lights should stay on long enough so we can all find our assholes and shove our heads up them!

The UN Space Treaty is Holding Us Back!

earthrise

Apollo Earthrise

2011 marks the 42’nd anniversary of the Apollo 11 moon landing.  42 idiot infested years have passed since that glorious day and nothing that has happened since comes within a nautical league of matching it.  My vile boomer generation has downplayed the significance of space exploration for decades.  I remember getting a shrill lecture from my left leaning fifth grade teacher about what a waste of money the space program was.  Being a self-assured child so I told my teacher he was preening unimaginative Neanderthal. This landed me in detention but I refused to apologize.

Manned space flight has been in a depressing, decades long, holding pattern. The real advances in space exploration have come exclusively from unmanned probes and robots.  While astronauts have been going round and round in that orbiting boondoggle known as the International Space Station the Voyagers are on the brink of interstellar space, probes are on their way to Pluto and Mercury, Cassini is orbiting Saturn, a small armada of orbiters and crawlers are exploring Mars, low-budget missions discovered water on the moon, space telescopes like Chandra, Hubble and Spitzer have shown us wonder after wonder and, capping it all off,  WMAP determined the age of the entire frigging universe.  Compare these awesome achievements to ISS astronauts unplugging zero-G toilets.

Why has so little been accomplished? I can think of two good reasons.

  1. Exclusive government control
  2. The UN Space Treaty

Until recently only governments could afford space programs.  In the early days of space exploration government control made sense but that era is coming to an end.  In a few decades private entities will be able to mount manned Mars expeditions and send robots anywhere in the solar system and beyond.  The technology is coming along nicely but I am afraid the politics will soon be a gigantic millstone around our necks. The millstone takes the form of the absurd UN Space Treaty.

800px-Outer_Space_Treaty

Green: UN Space Treaty nations

The UN space treaty is another sorry artifact of the 1960’s.   It reads like a bunch of unwashed socialist hippies got together and decided to ban capitalism in space. There is no other way to explain ridiculous terms like:

  1. The exploration and use of outer space shall be carried out for the benefit and in the interests of all countries and shall be the province of all mankind.
  2. Outer space is not subject to national appropriation by claim of sovereignty, by means of use or occupation, or by any other means.
  3. States shall be responsible for national space activities whether carried out by governmental or non-governmental activities.
  4. States shall be liable for damage caused by their space objects.
  5. States shall avoid harmful contamination of space and celestial bodies.

Suppose some daring entrepreneur decides to mount an asteroid mining expedition.  This is not as crazy as it sounds.  Asteroids are relatively easy to get to and very easy to get off of. They also contain mountains of valuable rare earths, platinum and gold. Eros alone holds well over 20 trillion dollars of metals.  You could pay off the US national debt by mining one dinky asteroid! One day, not very long from now, robot asteroid mining will make a compelling business case. To bad the UN Space Treaty outlaws it.

If you have to pay off all of mankind (#1, #2) your compelling business case evaporates.  Environmentalists, (yeah space environmentalists),  would complain that mining damages and contaminates a celestial body (#4, #5). Finally, even if the operation was 100% privately funded, various governments could legally ransom our daring entrepreneur or shut him down (#3).  These tactics have already been tried.  Remember the hysteria that preceded the launch of Cassini.  A pack of morons decided that the Plutonium powered RTG on Cassini posed a grave threat to all mankind and started citing the UN Space Treaty in hopes of blocking the launch.  Cassini was not a money-making operation so we ignored the loons. Asteroid mining will be another thing all together.  Everyone will want their cut.  With the UN in charge we’re going to feel like the probed subjects in this Kids in Hall video.

The Kindle is just like the KKK

Oh Mohammed in a brothel how much more of this idiocy can we endure?  A certain brain-damaged official, (Thomas Perez), in the US Department of Justice apparently thinks allowing Universities to experiment with delivering textbooks via the Kindle violates the civil rights of the blind. This so is mind-boggling stupid that I thought it was a bad joke. Well it is a joke and it’s on us! We are entering the final stages of Pournellian Iron Law paralysis in the United States.  Remember a vote for any Democrat anywhere is a vote for submission to morons like Perez.

G20 fails to end G20

Last weekend I passed through Toronto.  The city was bracing for the over priced and utterly pointless G20 dog and pony show.  The G20 circus did not disappoint.  On cue the usual crew of recreational anarchists left their parents basements long enough to engage the police, set cars on fire and smash store windows.  The police responded by arresting hundreds of protestors and holding them for hours in horrific detention facilities that did not offer vegan food!  Hey, it’s Canada, a gluten-free diet is probably enshrined somewhere in the Charter of Rights and Freedoms.

Mirroring the idiocy in the streets the G20 leaders wasted tax dollars in grand style by literally phoning one in for the children.  They also muttered something about reducing government debt and doing a better job of pretending to be fiscally sane.  Hey G20! I have a suggestion for that debt reduction thing — how about no more G20 meetings!  Video conferencing software does a pretty good job; give it a try!

Given the pitiful track record and high costs of the G20 one wonders why any sane country would host such a boondoggle.  Nothing of importance is ever achieved at these photo-ops and if something worthwhile accidently emerges it will be ignored or sabotaged.  I know it’s good for our rulers to get out and meet with their peers: all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.  Still it’s hard, in ostensibly democratic countries like Canada, to sell the public on the awesome benefits of hosting the G20. Do you remember how the Canadian public refused to fund the G20 when asked in the pre-conference referendum?  Oops sorry, I was thinking of how things should work!  Nobody ever asks the public if they want to pay because the answer would be a resounding no.

The G20 is coveted, courted and consummated for exactly the same reason that more expensive boondoggles like the Olympics and the World Cup are: it’s a great opportunity to punt public funds to your friends.